Once upon a time, there was a man who was so smokin' hot, he decided to don a piece of fabric over his face in order to preserve his fiery looks. This decision, little did he realize, transformed him all at once into the coolest man in town.

Okay, so maybe his motive for wearing what we now call a hat was a little more practical than that. But flash forward to last Tuesday and we've got Hayley from San Luis Obispo dutifully upholding the legacy of that illustrious gentleman (who's name we can't recall). Thank you, illustrious gentleman who's name we can't recall. Because of you, we're now the cool kids on the block, hot as all get out in our multitude of hats. To you sir, we tip our caps.

So, then, now that we've had our little history lesson - you're welcome - we've provided you with a homework assignment. Don't worry, it isn't hard. Just a simple click away, in fact. Because you now have the opportunity to continue this ancient tradition so that it may live on eternally. So step on up! Fulfill your sacred duty! Honor the historic innovation that is the hat! Let's not let Mr. What's-His-Name be forgotten!

1. The Explorer Hat

Auto Reply: 'I'm not in the office right now. I'm out exploring the wonders of South America in my new hat.'

The Hayden Panama Hat from Wyeth features a stiff, flat brim, an adjustable ribbon for sizing purposes, and a two-toned braided outer band with tassels - perfect for trekking through the wiles of South America, or, you know, Target.

2. The Embellished Hat

'Oh these feathers? I gathered them from the floor of the Amazon during my latest expedition. Nbd.'

Wyeth's Sloan hat in deep green showcases a mild feather detail set in place with a wide outer band, while an adjustable ribbon hidden in the sweatband locks it into place. No more chasing your hat across the parking lot every time a gust of wind strikes you.

3. The Conductor Hat

'He was such a lovely man, that train conductor, for lending me his hat.'

The Cora Cap from Wyeth is not your typical captain's hat. Set in a soft velvet fabric, feel free to rock this baby during your daily train ride to work, your night about town, or that Christmas party you were invited to.

4. The Ranch Hat

'But of course I carry my lass-o with me. It would be silly of me not to.'

Another Wyeth favorite, the Drew Fedora features a stiff brim with a dyed ribbon and bandana trim duo. An adjustable ribbon under the sweatband keeps that bad boy top-side while you focus on the round-up.

5. The Folksy Hat

'Being an artist is, too, a profession, thank you very much, Carol.'

Give yourself a bit of an edge in our folksy Jordan Boater from Wyeth, boasting a stiff flat brim and a thick pull-through ribbon that ties beneath the chin.

6. The Fashion Hat

'But darling, you said 'dress up.' Do you not see the leopard print? I mean, honestly.'

A classy add-on to your daily look, Wyeth's Nelson Hat includes a delightful leopard print accent in conjunction with its thick white outer band. Meanwhile, an adjustable ribbon beneath the sweatband lets you size things just so for your afternoon tea with the ladies.

7. The Essential Hat

 'I feel like this hat really accentuates my deeper emotions, you know?'

Kariella top-seller, the Billie Hat, is yet another Wyeth staple. Featured in a classic Panama style with a stiff flat brim and a vegan leather band, you can adjust this also with that hidden ribbon underneath the sweatband. Most importantly, though, allow your own personal style to shine through by choosing the color that suits you best. The Billie Hat comes in black, heather brown, chocolate, and taupe.